I Don't Know What To Write

But I do know that my life is in the crapper right now---for a number of reasons.

The Good News:
It can only get better from here.

Life is hard and unexpected. Really bad things sometimes happen to really good people, and no one knows how to explain it. It's unexplainable. If men are that they might have joy, then why do the people who are trying the hardest to obtain and deserve that joy sometimes have the hardest time finding it?

Sometimes I think that maybe, just maybe, I am too stubborn. Maybe the only way the Lord can teach me the things that I need to learn is through putting me in situations where my heart can be broken. Maybe that's the only time I am truly humbled. It gives new meaning to the phrase, "broken heart and a contrite spirit". My question is, what am I supposed to learn from this?

Sometimes the best people in the world have their own personal demons that no one else can see. And sometimes those demons don't make the best people in the world any less the best people in the world - except to themselves. And sometimes that is exactly why they can't seem to free themselves. The worst part is that no one else can really do anything to help them - they have to do it for themselves, but finding the courage and strength to do so, especially when they feel alone, is the greatest struggle. That's how the adversary gets us. He makes us feel isolated and worthless; devoid of hope and unable to love ourselves. From there it's a downward spiral into nothingness unless we somehow find a reason or a way to hold on; to fuel our strength and our willingness to overcome. That's the hope in the Atonement. Christ is the only way that people stuck in the grasp of the adversary can ever find a way to break free. And because of Him, we never actually have to do it alone.

We all find ourselves in this place at one time or another in our lives. I've been there many times myself and I've watched friends and loved ones go through it too, all to different degrees. I believe that it is in those moments that we catch a glimpse of what unconditional love is, what it means, and what it can do. It is in those moments that God allows us to feel a fraction of the love that he has for those particular people, and then we can see them for all that they are and all that they can be. If it weren't for the people in our lives that can sometimes see us through God's eyes, finding hope would be infinitely harder to do.

I've been on both sides. I've felt true, compassionate, unconditional love for a select few individuals in my life and I've had people who have refused to give up on me.

I wont give up on you. I believe in you.